Stop tracking me down, craziness.

I mean, I try to be a good retired villain; I'm not too enthusiastic about some Rorschach wannabe bursting out of my refrigerator in the middle of the night thirty years from now.  I've plainly laid down that I'm retired (though that doesn't mean that I can't still be on speaking terms with either side of this nutty little community,) and that anyone stupid enough to try and draw me out of retirement is going to discover really quickly that in the real world, the cops don't go in for your shtick like your Youtube audience does.

Having said that, why the hell is Phoenix Jones continually popping up EVERYWHERE?!  Seriously.  What the hell is UP with that?  The guy is appearing in blogs I read that aren't even remotely connected to the RLSH or RLSV communities.  He's either the biggest fame-whore this side of Portland (Actually, I believe he is, since Seattle is closer to me than Portland...  Huh.) Or he's actively trying to figure out how to appear in as many of my RSS feeds as possible, even the ones that are about yarn and kittens and shit like that.

Yes.  I subscribe to the occasional yarn and kitten blog.  Back up; you don't know me.

Now, Phoenix Jones is talked about by Rainn Wilson on Jimmy Kimmel Live, which pretty much guarantees that Jimmy Kimmel himself is going to ask Phoenix Jones on to the program at some point in the near future. (Jimmy Kimmel and Rainn Wilson both being Seattleites, along with Phoenix Jones himself.)
Now, I don't ask too much in life; I only want a nice warm place I can work nine or ten hours a day, a nice warm place to lay my head at night, food on the table, gas in my car, and the occasional chuckle at idiots in spandex.  What I didn't ask out of life is to somehow be cosmically and karmically pursued by this moronic juicehead who seems intent on taking over the entirety of the Internet.

Phoenix Jones, get the blue hell off of my everything.